His radio show was
wonderful. Then along came Danny Bonaduce.
January
13, 2007
THE TIME
HAS COME to talk about Adam Carolla. Because you're reading the
Op-Ed page of the Los Angeles Times, there's a good chance you're
only vaguely aware of him as a host of cable shows you don't like
or radio programs you don't tune in to. Maybe you've seen the bus
ads for KLSX radio's "The Adam Carolla Show," which bill
him as an "American Genius." You probably thought this
was idiotic hyperbole. I'm here to tell you it's not. I'm also
here to tell you not to listen to his show. Not now.
Carolla,
a 42-year-old comedian and former carpenter/carpet cleaner/boxing
instructor from North Hollywood, replaced Howard Stern in several
West Coast markets just over a year ago, when Stern went to satellite
radio. I've always appreciated Stern's insouciance and defiance
of radio conventions, but if the self-proclaimed "King of
All Media" is in a class by himself, I'd say that his terrestrial
radio replacement is in a far more advanced class. For 10 years,
Carolla delivered some of the most sophisticated comedy monologues
I've ever heard on "Loveline," a late-night call-in sex
advice show for teens that he co-hosted with Dr. Drew Pinsky.
I listened
to that show whenever I could, and not because I wanted to hear
15-year-olds from Oklahoma asking questions about genital piercing.
I listened because Carolla had a take on the hypocrisies of the
human condition that was always smart, frequently radical and occasionally
downright brilliant. Famous for his analogies, which he expands
into complicated, protracted tangents on everything from junior
college to ranchera music to the absurdity of "not being judgmental," Carolla's
mental and verbal dexterity would make any professional writer
jealous — at least it does this one.
Even though
I cried when Carolla said his farewells on "Loveline" in
November 2005 (the show continues with a new co-host, but its luster
is gone), I soon got used to hearing him in the morning. Granted,
things were different in the brash light of day. Undoubtedly scrutinized
by executives (the show is produced by CBS as part of their Free
FM platform) and no longer anchored by the pathos of the "Loveline" callers, "The
Adam Carolla Show" took a while to find its footing. But Carolla,
a guy's guy who is interested in cars and strippers and the gross-out
factors of bad smells (that Carolla cable show you didn't like?
Comedy Central's "The Man Show" from 1999 to 2003), is
a natural for the testosterone-driven arena of morning radio.
There's more
to him than that, however. Carolla's primary subject has always
been class, the mannerisms and material ambitions that accompany
that great American pastime known as socioeconomic striving. Having
positioned himself as a lug-headed refugee from the low-rent reaches
of the Valley — an oft-cited piece of Carolla trivia is that
he got carbon monoxide poisoning as a kid from his mother's boyfriend's
Volkswagen bus — he mocks trailer-trash culture without seeming
remotely mean-spirited. He can also dissect the pretensions of
affluence in a way that is actually interesting. Despite the masturbation
jokes and pot references, to listen to Carolla is to sit in on
an acid-tongued anthropology lecture. And you'd want to take notes.
Until Jan.
2. That's when CBS replaced a handful of supporting cast members
with Danny Bonaduce, the former "Partridge Family" star
now best known for reality shows focusing on his struggles with
drug and alcohol abuse. If I may attempt my own Carollian analogy,
this is akin to taking a highly crafted Impressionist painting
and slapping a coat of Glidden on it. I've never seen a worse case
of mediocrity usurping talent. Whereas Carolla is nimble and witty,
Bonaduce is a lame, one-note blowhard whose hard-living past belies
a worldview that is utterly generic. He constantly interrupts Carolla
with his self-absorbed, clueless badinage, more or less demoting
Carolla to sidekick on his own show. To tune in now is to hear
not a radio program but a hijacking.
What's happening
to "The Adam Carolla Show" goes beyond ratings anxieties.
It's about the popular media's chronic distrust of the public's
ability to get a joke unless it's shoved down our throats. Though
TV laugh tracks are being phased out, the effect of televised scream-a-thons
(any reality show) and ham-handed shock jocks (most radio morning
shows) constitutes an even more insidious form of canned laughter.
By refusing to leave us to our own devices, it absolves us of the
responsibility to pay attention and laugh or be shocked in a genuine
way.
Stern took
millions of listeners with him to satellite radio. Carolla, who
is more nuanced and complex than Stern, is hard to label ("American
Genius" resonates only with the already converted) and hard
to market. That means he needs time to find his audience, and vice
versa. Now, thanks to myopic executives who overturned their wise
decision to hire him with the baffling decision to drown him out,
neither Carolla nor his audience stands a chance. That's hard on
his fans, and I suspect even harder on him.